“MOSQUE LADY INTERVIEWS EZELDA”, BY DAWN NARET’
TODAY, I HOPE TO ASSESS WHETHER MS EZELDA IS “HALLAL” OR NOT….WE “MUUZZIES” MUST ABIDE BY THE RULES THAT ANYTHING NOT “ACCEPTABLE OR CLEAN – ACCORDING TO QURAN”, MUST BE AVOIDED FOR THE SAFETY OF OUR HOLY MUSLIM SOULS.
Well….Well…..Well…. Miss or Ms or …are you a female or a non-descript ? I don’t mean to be insulting, but I hear that your people can change their identity and faces and just about anything they choose if they have a mind to. Is it Ms. Ezelda?
Actually, we don’t mind being called by any of your usual gender variations….we are, after all……..ALL GENDERS AND ALL SPECIES.
MUUZ.LADY: Is that why you all speak the answer at the same time? do you have to all speak at once?
EZ’S: Yes! ! (answer en masse)
MUUZ.LADY: I see. Well, OK…….YAWL ! ……..Now, as I said, I have ta show that yawl are “Hallal”, to satisfy my Muuzzie folks who are concerned that they might be associating with ghosts, spirits or dead politicians, if they pay any mind to yawl. So, ARE you accociated with these areas, cause I’d like ta ease their minds about these “sticky – wickies” ?
EZ’S: Well, is that a slur? Why would you call us “sticky”? We are fully alive, so we are not ghosts. We have the same earth spirit as everyone else, and we are very clean beings, not at all “sticky” ! But, although we DID impersonate Condoleezza Rice, at the Summit meetings in the Middle East, like her, “WE DO NOT DO POLITICS” !
MUUZZ.LADY: Oh MY ! Oh MY ! So THAT was the reason she had 10 different noses and 7 different sets of teeth ! It was yawl ! I can see the resemblence now…..but how cum she neva had a pointed head in them pictures? EZ’S: Well, our cosimc cone processing region is changable, according to the volumn of flatulance and hot hissy-fit air, as well as environmental emmissions of thermal-gaseous fuel-cell emmission globules, we are metabolizing in our earth clod physiques at any given time. We simply take 2 GAS-X, 3-EX-LAX and a glass or 2 of EYE OF NEWT. That allows us to deflate our Cranial Conic Composition. 
MUUZZ. LADY: MY GOD! MY GOD! I’ll bet you couldn’t repeat THAT in a hound hair minute ! My God ! And you must have poor NEWT going blind, jis so’s yawl can avoid a “Bad Head Day” ! Poor Mr. Gingrich !
EZ’S: No, NO ! We don’t get anything from Mr. Gingrich ! We take a dose of “eye of newt”, it’s a stew made from a small lizard! A delicacy, like frog legs you folks eat. Though, how you can eat frog legs untreated or processed and not be jumpin up and down and flipping out and flipping toes and fingers……we’ll never understand ! We only did this process, because we were advised to wear “hijab”, a head babushka, while in the Middle East.
We knew that Ms Condi never complied with the “Hijab” advise, so we only had to wear those greesy little black wigs, which did’t look as much like her, as we would have liked, cause she has that fine, silky, baby hair. But that is the only association we have with politics, And Ms Condi is not dead either.
MUUZZ. LADY: Oh ! What a relief ! “EYE OF NEWT”, never saw it on any of our menues….not sur if I try it. As fer as the flippin finger reponse to eatin frog-legs………..I think mebbe G. Dubya has had too many ‘o those !
“AW MAN-N-N ! EZELDA SAID I CAN’T BE ONE OF HER ELVES….CAUSE I’M A CANEHEAD NOT A CONEHEAD ! !”
